31 Days to Becoming a Better Wife: Day 16: Submission Definition

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Okay, I hope you found the 7 Misconceptions on Submission posted earlier today helpful. I know it really helped me to narrow my focus when writing on such a broad topic.

Over the last week or so we having been looking at all the ways God calls us to submit We examined servant submission to one another, authoritative or lawful submission, church submission, Godly submission, and marital submission in order to come up with a definition of submission.

Wow, I sure know how to take the long way around! A week later and we manage to finally come up with a definition!

All joking aside, it is my belief that submission is humbling yourself to the ways of the Lord and falling under His authority.

Now, I know that may shock some that I only said “falling under His authority”, but I did so because falling under His authority encompasses all the areas submission. If we submit to God’s authority, we must submit to each other, to our husbands, to our government, to church authorities, etc., because His word tells us we must.

Yes, I think it is really that simple.

Below is another insert I found at http://www.girlsgonewise.com . You will notice that we don’t have the same definition of submission, but I thought this article has great application potential.

“I’ve been married for 29 years—“just getting going” says my mom, who’s been married for 62.
“What it looks like” is a difficult question, since submission is not something foreign—not something “other”—to the character of a redeemed woman. Submission is not as much an “action” as it is an “attitude.” So it can’t be dictated by behavioral prescriptives. Submission boils down to a having spirit of amenability. It means being soft, receptive, responsive, and agreeable. Because of the misconceptions surrounding the definition of submission, I actually prefer to use the term “amenability.” Amenability comes from the French amener (to lead). An amenable woman is “leadable” as opposed to “ungovernable” She’s responsive to input and likely to cooperate. Amenability is part of the three-fold womanly disposition of 1 Peter 3:4-5, which includes gentleness, calmness, and amenability—which works itself out in a married woman’s life in submission to her husband.

So “what it looks like” on an on-going basis, is that I am soft, receptive, and agreeable toward my husband. I love responding to his lead. I respect who God created him to be as a man—and support his efforts to provide godly oversight for our family. I respect the position of responsibility that goes along with being a husband and father. “Respect” is probably the best word to describe what submission looks like in my marriage.

For me, submission is one of those things that is far more easily identified by its absence rather than its presence. I know that I am struggling with it when I am critical, impatient, defiant, and “snarky” toward my husband—when I refuse to cooperate and am unresponsive to input, when I rush in and take control, when I fail to “provide space” to allow my husband the opportunity to be a man and provide godly oversight for our family. In other words, it’s not readily apparent to me when I’m submitting, but it’s painfully obvious to me when I am not. I sense that I am disrespecting/ disregarding my husband, taking control, and pulling against him rather than for and with him.”

Until tomorrow, stay safe and God bless,


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